In Genesis 21:12 it amazed me to see God telling Abraham to “Listen to whatever Sarah tells you,” which meant meeting her demand to kick the teenage Ishmael and his mother out of the family home.
But in God softening Abraham’s response to Sarah and focusing his mind on “listening” to her, it prepared Abraham very nicely for what happened next. Because in verse 22, Abimelech king of Gerar dropped by for a visit, along with Phicol the commander of his forces. This was the same Abimelech who’d torn a strip off Abraham back in chapter 20:9, yelling “You have done things to me that should not be done,” because Abraham’s blunder in Gerar had put Abimelech’s entire nation at risk (4).
So it’s not surprising that Abimelech brought along his top general to witness Abraham swearing before God that in future Abraham would “not deal falsely” with him or his children and descendants ever again (21:23). But he too then contributed to the softening of Abraham when he told Abraham to his face, “Show to me – and to the country you’re now living in as a foreigner – the same kindness I have shown to you.”
This was somewhat humbling, because Abraham was God’s choice, but here was a secular king educating him on mutual kindness being the key to people getting along and dealing with difficult issues. Fortunately, Abraham took it on the chin and formally agreed to being kind in return (24). But right after that he put his foot in it again when, instead of the softly, softly approach he’d just agreed to, he storms up to Abimelech in verse 25, “complaining” the king’s servants had seized control of a well Abraham had dug (30). To Abraham’s acute embarrassment, Abimelech replies that he knew nothing about the well being seized – since Abraham hadn’t bothered to inform him about it (26).
It was a much softened Abraham, therefore, who “brought sheep and cattle for Abimelech” (27), followed by the two men making another treaty confirming the well belonged to Abraham (30-31). Again, mutual kindness saved the day, and Abimelech and Phicol (happily) “returned to the land of the Philistines” (32). Abraham, meanwhile, had obviously learnt something from this episode, because he stayed without further incident in Abimelech’s kingdom “for a long time” (34).
It also prepared him nicely for the next potentially delicate incident in his life, when “Negotiating a burial site for Sarah”….(next blog)
P.S. “Abimelech” was a title, not a personal name. The same title for the king of Gerar comes up again in Genesis 26. Same title, different man.
Buck To Basics 